telescreen.org

Did Al Franken infiltrate the GOP's message HQ?

That's gotta be the real reason that all the dittoheads are going around with blue-painted fingers today.   (I just saw David Dreier on "Crossfire", waving his finger in Begala's face.  Haven't they cancelled that show?)

I mean, it's great to commemorate the first democratic elections in Iraq in fifty-plus years.  (Even if one side is boycotting them.)  But do they realize how dorky they look?

(By the way, check out Chris Allbritton's great reporting from Baghdad today.)

I'm a longtime fan of London Transport's Poems on the Underground, which places placards bearing poems (or excerpts thereof) in the Tube.  So, I was gratified when I moved to New York and discovered that the MTA had adopted the idea as well and created the Poetry In Motion program.  It's one of those civic-minded things that vastly improves the urban experience and brings a bright spot of humanity to the daily grind.

Most of the poems featured are fairly upbeat and good for a thoughtful moment or pleasant diversion from the commute, but I was kind of surprised on Friday to see one of my favorite poems on the E train.  W.B. Yeats' The Second Coming is fairly chilling and apocalyptic, and not at all cheerful.

Although, I got to thinking.  What better describes the experience of riding the New York subway than "Mere anarchy is loosed upon the world"?  After all, it's but a short step from the panhandler snarling at you to "The ceremony of innocence is drowned."  And, when I contemplate the MTA's budget problems and service cuts, it's clear indeed that "Things fall apart; the center cannot hold."

I guess the oddest part about reading Yeats on the subway was when my wandering eye was reading the poem, from top to bottom, and strayed off the placard:

The best lack all conviction, while the worst

Are full of passionate intensity.

Do not hold doors

I think this qualifies as "the grand tour":

1. Go to MSN Maps & Directions.
2. In the Start section, select "Norway" from the country list and enter "Haugesund" into the "City" field.
3. In the End section, select "Norway" from the country list and enter "Trondheim" into the "City" field.
4. Click on "Get Directions."

(In case MSN is on-the-ball, I've saved the results here.)  (via Protocols of the Yuppies of Zion.)

Insomnia sucks.  Last night I fell asleep at 4:45am.  A couple of days before it was 5:10am.  This is getting old.  (I nearly wrote "this is getting tiresome", which would unfortunately be inaccurate.)

UPDATE:  4:11am.  Still awake.

This is just bizarre.  At Thursday's ceremony marking the 60th anniversary of the liberation of Auschwitz, Vice President Cheney was wearing a parka, knit cap, and hiking boots.  At a formal, solemn ceremony at the place where approximately a million people were killed, the official representative of the President of the United States was wearing casual clothes.  The other heads of state and official representatives -- such as Vladimir Putin, Jacques Chirac, and Israeli President Moshe Katsav -- were wearing dark formal clothes as a mark of respect:

Was it a luggage mixup?  Hardly.  Cheney flies on Air Force Two, and something makes me think (in contrast to my experiences on US Airways) his bags wouldn't be left behind.

Was it, as some right-wingers have suggested, due to his heart condition?  Doubtful.  The high temperatures this week in Krakow, approximately 45 miles away from Oswiecim, are around 20-25 degrees F, with lows around 9-10 degrees F.  Cheney managed to wear formal clothes -- without a hat or gloves -- to his inauguration last week, after all.

Did Cheney not have a dark overcoat with him?  Did they somehow shockingly forget to pack one?  Nope.  He had one on yesterday, when he toured Auschwitz:

Why, then, the unconventional attire?  We know by now that nothing this White House does is unscripted or left to chance.  So, I'm forced to conclude that this was somehow deliberate.  Was Cheney asserting the primacy of his personal comfort over his country's paying respect to Holocaust victims?  Was it a message that the Bush Administration will continue its apparent policy of doing whatever it damn well feels like, with no concern given to what anyone else -- anywhere in the world -- might think?  Was it a message to "Old Europe", meant to convey that their views aren't relevant?  (You know, like the "quaint" Geneva Conventions.)  Or was it more along the lines of Cheney's simple three-word speech to Patrick Leahy on the Senate floor last June?

Because this did not happen by chance.

News flash:  O'Reilly admits he was wrong.

As threatened earlier, I've posted some pictures of the flood in Marietta, Ohio earlier this month.

Esquire has posted "The Man Who Retired", Bill Zehme's 2002 interview with Johnny Carson.

They've also posted "What Johnny Means To Me", a collection of tributes from 2002.

And here's an NYT article on Carson's relationship with New York.

From this AP obit of Philip Johnson:

Johnson, who wore black-framed owl-shaped glasses, got even more attention. . .

Owl-shaped?  Really?

"Owlish", perhaps.

Watch out, Punxsutawney Phil...here comes Li'l Bit, at Groundhawg Day.

Bush to black community:  Support my plan.  You're going to die young, and it'll benefit your heirs.

Safire tells us how to read a political column.  (Point #10:  (Avoid all asinine alliteration.")

A few more Johnny Carson encomia:

A letter to Carson from Steve Martin, in the NYT:

If I could wake you up for a minute, I would ask you to tell me how good you thought you were. "Between you and me," I think you would whisper, "I know I was great in a subtle, secret way." I think you would also say: "I enjoyed and understood the delights of split-second timing, of watching a comedian squirm and then rescue himself, of the surprises that arise from the fractional seconds of desperation when the comedian senses that the end of his sentence might fall to silence."

An appreciation by Frank Rich, in the NYT, on the occasion of his retirement in 1992:

By his choices of guests, and his treatment of them on the air, he helped establish a kindly hierarchy of stardom that spread to other media and set a show-business pecking order. He not only promoted significant and offbeat new talent, whether a Barbra Streisand in the early 1960's or an Eddie Murphy in the early 1980's, but also kept the spotlight on retired talent. Mr. Carson has made a point of keeping a William Demarest or James Stewart in view after their performing days were over, even as he instinctively knew when the moment came to give up on passing sideshows, like Tiny Tim, the troubadour who in 1969 married Miss Vicki on the highest-rated "Tonight" show ever.

A long profile of Carson by Kenneth Tynan, which appeared in the New Yorker in 1978:

Tone of monologue is skeptical, tongue-in-cheek, ironic. Manner: totally relaxed, hitting bull’s-eyes without seeming to take aim, TV’s embodiment of “Zen in the Art of Archery.” In words uttered to me by the late screenwriter Nunnally Johnson, “Carson has a delivery like a Winchester rifle.” Theme: implicitly liberal, but careful to avoid the stigma of leftism. The unexpected impromptus with which he rescues himself from gags that bomb, thereby plucking triumph from disaster, are also part of the expected pleasure. “When it comes to saving a bad line, he is the master”—to quote a tribute paid in my presence by George Burns. Carson registers a gag’s impact with instant, seismographical finesse. If the laugh is five per cent less than he counted on, he notes the failure and reacts to it (“Did they clear the hall? Did they have a drill?”) before any critic could, usually garnering a double-strength guffaw as reward. Whatever spoils a line—ambiguous phrasing, botched timing, faulty enunciation—he is the first to expose it. Nobody spots flaws in his own work more swiftly than Carson, or capitalizes on them more effectively.

And finally, a lovely essay by the Antigeist, about how Johnny Carson made her recognize the cold fact of mortality:

I remember the night. I was about seventeen, laying in my apartment watching TV, Carson's head framed by the vee made by my outstretched feet. It was the 25th anniversary special, and they were showing clips of the most memorable moments and guests to date. When they cut to present-day, you could see how he and Ed had aged; more wrinkles, a lot more snow on the roof. One of the guests (I don't remember who) said something like, "Here's to the next 25 years!" It made me wonder how long they would continue to do the show before they retired. Ten more years? Twenty? Then I thought, what would the Tonight Show be like in twenty years? What would I be like in twenty years? I did the math; in twenty years I would be in my late-thirties, and Johnny Carson would be...Johnny would be...oh my God.

When I was in Ohio a few weeks ago, I bought an old issue of Life magazine from a used bookstore in Columbus.  It's the January 23, 1970 issue, and it features an interesting profile of Johnny Carson.  ("Johnny Carson: The Lonesome Hero of Middle America.")  Carson is revealed as a very private, intense, and warmhearted guy who could also be somewhat prickly at times.  (And for good reason, we see.)

I thought others might be interested in the article and the accompanying pictures, so I've scanned it.

I'm awaiting permission to post it, so I hope that Time-Life will help me out.

UPDATE:  I heard back from Time, and they want $2000/year (!) to post the article.  So you may be able to find it in a library (again, it's the January 23, 1970 issue), but you won't see it here on telescreen.org.  Sorry.

Dana hits one out of the park (and embarrasses her family -- two-for-one!) with her take on a dippy e-mail forward.

By the way, Caren has some great pix of this weekend's snowstorm here, on her weather blog.

(Incidentally -- and to be nitpicky in the extreme -- this wasn't technically a blizzard.  It was a blizzard in Boston and Providence, but not in NYC, Philadelphia, or Washington, DC.)

(See the comments below.)

B. and I took a brief walk around the neighborhood on Saturday to check it out.  The wind was blowing snow in our faces and we only made it a few blocks before we decided to head back home and hunker down with a movie and some hot cocoa.  (Good thing B. gave me a flask for Christmas...that swig of Maker's Mark halfway through our walk kept us warm till we got home.)

I didn't have time earlier, because I was busy committing journalism, but I wanted to say a little something about Johnny Carson. 

He spoke to everyone. I'm reminded of the scene in "Fargo" in which the crooks hire hookers...but then end up watching Johnny Carson's monologue in bed, just as millions of people across America did every night.  (In his "Brilliant Careers" appreciation of Carson on Salon.com, Jack Boulware writes "On the good nights, he was the second best thing you could do in bed -- but on his best nights, he was the best.")

I'll never forget the night when he had a sweet little old lady on the program. She worked at a potato chip factory as a quality-control inspector, and showed Johnny the interestingly misshapen potato chips she'd found. One looked like a candle, one looked like a dog, one looked like Richard Nixon, some looked like other celebrities, et cetera. Johnny was solicitous and interested...but when she looked away for a moment, he brought out a big bowl of chips from underneath his desk, and chomped one loudly. Her look of utter shock and Johnny's devilish grin made the program, and that will always be my favorite Carson moment.

His monologue killed.  Every night.  You knew that the best five minutes of topical comedy -- period -- each night were about to happen when that multicolored curtain parted at 11:30.  As Roger Ebert put it in his lovely essay about Carson today:

Carson's gifts were limitless. His skits and his characters, his slapstick and gags and funny hats and costumes, came from inexhaustible comic energy, but he never overplayed his hand. He was cool beyond cool. He made Sinatra seem to be trying too hard.

So many more wonderful moments...from Carnac the Magnificent to Art Fern and Ed Ames' tomahawk toss. My favorites were when an animal didn't behave, a joke fell flat, or a prop didn't work -- he'd spew out a string of extemporaneous one-liners, each funnier than the last.

I'll give the last word to David Letterman, Carson's true successor in talent and spirit, if not -- due to network politics -- in fact.  (Read Bill Carter's The Late Shift.)  His statement on Carson's death:

It's a sad day for his family and for the country. All of us who came after are pretenders. We will not see the likes of him again. He gave me shot on his show and in doing so, gave me a career.

A night doesn't go by that I don't ask myself, 'What would have Johnny have done?' He has been greatly missed since his retirement. Thank God for videotapes and DVDs. In this regard, he will always be around. He was the best. A star and a gentleman.

Goodnight, Johnny.

I'll write more later, but rest in peace, Johnny.  You were one of the greatest, and you will be sorely missed.

(ADDENDUM:  I've started a MetaFilter thread.)  (and thanks, Matt.)

Here's a list of a few of his guests.  And here are some quotes from his final show.

I just found (via Monk) I Read The Comics, So You Don't Have To.

What a brilliant site.

Spotted in the New London, CT Day:

Ross, 45, has said he wants no part in that claim and wants his execution to be carried out. While public defenders are trying to stop his death by lethal objection, Ross has hired a private attorney to represent him in the push to have his sentence carried out.

(my emphasis)

Man, those are some tough lawyers...

What happens if you dare criticize the Beloved Leader while appearing on the Fox News Channel?

Click and see.  (Transcript here.)

Oh, and while we're talking about inaugural coverage:  What liberal media?

What they said.  Don't forget it.  Especially when they sputter about impugning their so-called integrity.

(ADDENDUM:  Old news, obviously.  But I'm gonna leave it here...click to see it bigger.)

(More info available here, here, and here.)

I think this is the most vividly written weather briefing I've seen in some time:

THE ALBERTA CLIPPER WILL MOVE OFF THE NEW ENGLAND COAST OVERNIGHT
AND EXPLOSIVELY DEEPEN. A TIGHTENING PRESSURE GRADIENT WILL BE THE
RESULT AND ANOTHER FRIGID AIRMASS WILL RUSH INTO THE REGION FROM THE
NORTH THURSDAY THROUGH FRIDAY. ALTHOUGH THURSDAY WILL BE QUITE COLD
WITH A STIFF NORTH TO NORTHWEST WIND...THE REALLY COLD AIR WILL BE
DELAYED UNTIL FRIDAY. THEN...A RE-ENFORCING SHOT OF BITING COLD WILL
SWEEP SOUTHBOUND FROM EASTERN CANADA.

WIND CHILL READINGS ARE LIKELY TO DROP TO DANGEROUS LEVELS THURSDAY
NIGHT AND THROUGH THE DAY FRIDAY. THESE WIND CHILLS MAY GET AS LOW AS
15 DEGREES BELOW ZERO FOR LOCATIONS OUTSIDE OF THE NEW YORK METRO
AREA. THE CITY WILL NOT BE SPARED THOUGH WITH WIND CHILLS AS LOW AS
5 BELOW POSSIBLE FROM THURSDAY NIGHT THROUGH THE DAY FRIDAY.

JUST AS THE FRIGID COLD STARTS TO LOOSEN ITS GRIP ON THE LOCAL
AREA...ANOTHER WINTRY WEATHER EVENT WILL BE UNFOLDING TO OUR WEST. A
VERY POTENT UPPER LEVEL STORM IS EXPECTED TO TEAM UP WITH A MOIST
DISTURBANCE MOVING OUT OF THE BAJA CALIFORNIA AREA.

Usually the National Weather Service is, shall we say, rather more prosaic in its bulletins.

Best CNN.com headline I've seen all day.  (via Talking Points Memo.)